At this point, I want to complete what I create. Starting is easy for me, easier than it was. I’m getting better at sticking with the projects. Finishing is hard. I’m also taking a more heart-centered approach to blogging, and in the blogosphere, my central conflict is what’s popular versus what speaks to me. Fat Chic is a blog that could go gangbusters if I wanted it to – so am I not working on it due to fear of success, or because it’s not where my heart lies? I think the truth lies somewhere in between, especially as my definition of success does not have phrases like “brand partnership” and “audience reach” in it.
This is my second time completing the Artist’s Way. No, I didn’t complete it in 12 weeks the last time, either – but I did complete it. The last time, the issues that came up were needing sense of freedom from deadlines. Also, the result was that more and more of my energy diverted back to my writing career. I had been putting in 12-16 hours on my perfumery and getting very little for it, not even enough to support myself. I felt frustrated all the time.
Financially, I’m not doing much better, but I like myself more. I’m saying what needs to be said and while I’m still very pro-money, I don’t feel like I’m a slave to chasing a buck. I’m in the process of setting a few things out there to bring money my way that do not stem from perfumery work. I’m hopeful about it.