a Casual Check-in

I’m still working my way through Finding Water, and I am going to plug through all of Cameron’s works. Sometimes, despite my best efforts – despite anyone’s – you face a setback. A crazymaker torpedoes you at a delicate moment. You spill all the paint. The dog really does eat your homework (my friend’s dog actually did in college – just walked right into my dorm room and chowed down on the project I’ve been working on for days.) While assigning blame has a certain shallow satisfaction, blame assignation is also wasteful and destructive, it will tear you further from your path when you’re already drifting.

So I had a setback or two in the last two weeks. I didn’t place in an essay contest I’d entered – it’s OK, I’ll use the essay some other way. I also got the flu, quite badly, followed by a terrifying hives breakout (since  I break out daily, for one to terrify me it must be quite something.) There were no morning pages that week. There was no writing. There were chills, fever, and hallucinations I wish I could have recorded – but nope, no progress.

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That’s OK. Like dieting, like saving money, it’s tempting to say “the hell with it” when you’ve slid off course and you can see the results of sliding off course. Forget blame and recrimination – these setbacks are like weather; you don’t give up on picniking because one day it rained. So I’m resetting course and beginning again, patiently, one foot at a time.